NOW WHAT?!
I need to acknowledge and normalize the space between where we’ve been and where we are now/where we’re heading. Sometimes we have experiences in this life that completely change everything and we are never the same again. These disruptive experiences can run the gamut of “positive”, “negative”, self-created, or feel like it happened to us without our choice. Regardless, DISRUPTION happens and our reality as we knew it is now cracked open.
In this space, we are living in our familiar world, but WE ARE NO LONGER THE SAME. It can be all sorts of confusing, chaotic, upsetting, even exciting. The biggest example for me of this was when I had cancer at 14…my entire self-concept and the world as I knew it blew up.
So, now what?!!
Well, for a long time, I shoved as much down as possible to ignore that anything was different and that led to a slew of self-abandoning coping strategies through my 20s and early 30s. I was a shell of myself. A HIGH FUNCTIONING SHELL, but it wasn’t sustainable and I was beyond lost. To the point where I almost gave up completely.
Luckily, I had people and found communities that created space to integrate the old and new. Even thought it was MANY years later that I was actually able to address my reality - this fragmentation of my identity and world - I was able to close this gap (it’s never too late!) and find my way back home to myself.
While cancer is an extreme example, it doesn’t have to be extreme to experience a disruption and a disconnection from self, as life naturally unfolds. It’s actually quite normal. But what isn’t as normal and known is what we do next.
This gap period (aka UNBOUND SPACE) is technically just a step in the process of change. And it’s only temporary if we give ourselves the chance to integrate what we’ve experienced into our reality and what it means about us now. This requires support bc we are going someplace we’ve never been before, and having others with us who have walked thru disruption before eases the isolation and fear that is natural to this experience.
Wherever you are, know this gap is normal and if you meet it honestly, with support, you will find your way back to yourself and you will be stronger and more whole because of it. It IS 10000% worth the journey. Lemme know if I can support. 🤍
